As I recall, humans are the only mammals that don’t instinctively know how to swim. So yes, cows should be able to swim



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  1. Human babies, in fact, are born with the ability to swim… Some hospitals even require children to do so in order to strengthen their lungs.

  2. Because cows lack sphincters, I had always assumed that if they were immersed, their buttholes would fill with water and they would drown.

    So, at 4 a.m., I’ll be Google it.

  3. Because cows lack sphincters, I’d always assumed that if they were immersed, their buttholes would fill with water and they would drown.

    So, later at 4 a.m., I’ll googling that.

  4. The truth is that almost any quadrupedal mammal can swim, albeit inefficiently, and it is only the giant apes that have yet to master it. Human babies do not learn to swim on their own, but other great apes *can* learn.

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