Lying to kids is fun! [oc]

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  1. Pavlova was one of the dessert choices at a family wedding.
    I spent about an hour telling my nephew and niece Blablobla. When the waiter came around to ask what they wanted for dessert, they couldn’t tell Pavlova no matter how hard they tried. Blablobla had become ingrained in their heads.

  2. Buying them noisy toys and then leaving the state is even more entertaining.

    Have a good time, kids! Sis, you’ve lost your last ounce of sanity!

    Why would I buy your twins two ukeleles for their birthdays if you bought me a ukelele for my birthday?

    They’re putting money together for their younger brother’s drum kit.

  3. I don’t make the rules, but if you take the uncle shopping, he’ll do uncle stuff.

    If you want to see more of my comics, follow me on Instagram/Twitter @scarecrowbar.

  4. I used to do this to my niece all the time, and she’d crack up every time she realized I was making things up. I’m considering it a job well done now that she’s almost an adult with a well-honed bullshit detector.

  5. As I entered the store and the doors opened on their own, my father pretended that I had superpowers, and I believed him until I was way too old.

  6. In the summer, music trucks cruise the area, playing upbeat music for residents to enjoy. Since they’re pretty, the trucks are covered in ice cream videos.

  7. My high school teacher taught his nephew that pickles were ice cream and that pickles were ice cream. And ever since I found out about it, that man has been my hero.

  8. I had a wart on my knuckle when I was about 15, and my 8-year-old cousin asked what it was. “Oh, that’s fingeritis,” says the narrator.

    “Finger… it is?” says the narrator.

    “It’ll eventually develop into another finger,” says the narrator.

    “WOOOOOAH. I’m hoping to avoid getting fingeritis!”

  9. I can testify to this as both an aunt and a Pre-K teacher…my favourites have been that their computers won’t charge while they’re reading a book and that when they lay down, their ears turn red.

  10. I met a woman who referred to it as Pope Yes rather than Popeyes. Back in Ukraine, it appears that Popeyes chicken was not available.

  11. My ex’s nephew, who was learning to read, and I were playing Wii Sports. In baseball, he’d hit a double, and my ex told him that it was pronounced DOO-BLAY.

  12. I enjoy asking my niece what they really do and then being perplexed as to why they don’t follow through. Teach her that reality isn’t easy to come by, and that finding it always raises more questions than it answers.

  13. My father told me that the hotel next to Walmart was a toy factory, and that they could just walk on by all the toys. He also told me that jelly bellies were an adult-only treat, and that eating them would disturb our stomachs, but that the Great Value brand was created specifically for us.

  14. All of you seem to have misinterpreted the meme and contend that lying to children is unethical. Yes, that may be the case. But it doesn’t take away from the fact that it’s entertaining.

  15. Calvin’s father is on board.

    Tell her the old pictures are in black and white because that was the way the world was back then. For a while after the world went color in the 1960s, it was pretty grainy.

  16. My niece recently grasped the concept of sarcasm. “Ugh, Aunt Othybear, you’re being sarcastic again, aren’t you?” she exclaims.

  17. It brings back memories of my first Halloween with my nephews. “LETS GO LETS GO GO CANDY CANDY CANDY!” I kept saying after each house, and the kids would get all pumped up and sprint to the next. The older child vomited after a block of this because he was too excited. My sister was furious. The kid simply put on his mask again and stormed into the building, shouting like a lunatic.

  18. It was a bittersweet day when my nephews and niece called me out on my nonsense for the first time. It was good to see that they had matured to the point where they had developed a healthy sense of cynicism, but it made me sad to know that they were no longer children.

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